Herd Mentality Creates Mediocrity

In the about me page, I mentioned that sooner or later I will need to master public speaking. Well, the time has come and I started attending public speaking events.

Today I’ve been to one of the Toastmasters meetups and some observations there inspired me to write this blog post. This is the second time I attended Toastmasters. If you don’t know what Toastmasters is, it’s a worldwide organisation for people who want to improve their public speaking skills.

Back to the story. Today I attended Toastmasters meetup in a different part of London to the first one. This group was totally different from the previous one. First and foremost, I was required to wear a formal attire (which I’m not really fond of) and it took place in a luxury private club building in central London.

The building was truly prestigious: a light sunny interior made the place look really spacious, the classic decor of the building was stunning and the expensive chandeliers added extra glamour. When I got to the meeting, the room was almost full – around 20 people, I would say, maybe more. Dark wooden chairs were put in neat rows taking about a half of room’s space. The rest of the space was reserved for the area for speakers.

This group strictly followed all the rules outlined in the Toastmasters manual, I would assume. There was a grammarian, evaluators, the person who timed each speech and all the bells and whistles.  People who had to prepare the speeches in advance gave them in the most fancy language possible and they talked from their memory only, without any emotion. I felt like I was back at school, listening to the pupils’ memorised poems and stories.

Whoever mentioned fancy words, the ones you don’t hear often, were applauded and complimented. Whoever could talk completely from the memory without adding any spontaneous remarks, were appreciated. The meeting was cold and very formal -  it felt more like a politicians’ meeting rather than a speakers’ meetup.

I kept thinking during the meeting that there was no life to those speeches. People were simply talking from their minds, and that can never make another person resonate with your message. So many public speakers talk the same way, and that’s why they find it hard to attract any kind of audience.

Also, most public speakers don’t talk from their hearts, therefore they don’t sound genuine. If you don’t sound genuine, you will drastically lose credibility in the viewers’ eyes. Neither will you gain fans or receive compliments if you talk about the subject you have no interest in.

And this applies not only to public speaking. In any profession people are scared to stand out and to act from their hearts. But because they behave in the same way as everyone else, they become average and achieve no or little success.

It takes courage to show the world who you truly are, but if you do, the rewards will be astounding. If you can think of any public speaker at all, I bet he or she is different from the common herd. When I think of great public speakers, I remember…

Anthony Robbins, Eckhart Tolle, Guy Finley and Jim Rohn. These people are different from the flock, because they really express their true personalities when they are on stage.

Jim Rohn, for example, when he was alive, came across as being a bit strict, down to earth and he used to put his messages in simple terms.

Anthony Robbins is full of energy and personality, he is not afraid to sometimes sound too cheeky or too open.

Eckart Tolle is my favourite speaker: whilst on stage, he can stay quiet for what can seem like ages, yet people appreciate his teachings from the present moment.

Guy Finley is also amazing: when he speaks, his messages can seem confusing to say the least, yet they contain profound truths and can spiritually awaken those who are ready.

I hope now you see that all these speakers are wildly popular because they are so unique. Yet if they would memorise their speeches and never let their personalities shine through, they would not have achieved the success they enjoy now. As in any other occupation, it’s really important to show your true self and not be afraid to be spontaneous. Spontaneity is life, it’s your soul at work. Even if you make mistakes when you are being yourself, that’s completely fine, because at least you are not lying to yourself.

Those formal attires, memorised speeches and patting on the back for fancy words really did not make me want to come back to that meeting again. It was just too lifeless for me. I do not want to sound like any other public speaker, I want to develop my own style, and that, I’m afraid, was not encouraged in that meeting.

I don’t want to talk in a formal way – I want to talk informally and put my teachings in simple terms, so that they could be accessible to everyone. What’s the point of sounding like a three medical degrees having ego-bound individual, who thinks he or she is better than the rest?

I don’t want to give lifeless speeches. They don’t do any good for anyone – they simply stuff the minds of other people with lifeless information coming from the ego. I want to be authentic and I want to connect with every individual in the group, so that they would feel my enthusiasm and get infused by it. I truly believe that a great speech is the speech which inspires and enlightens individuals, rather than makes them want to sleep or leaves them confused.

Let’s take an example about standing out from the crowd from another field. Some life coaches ask me for advice on how to attract clients. The number one advice I give them is to be authentic and not try to sound like other coaches. I also advise them not to get life coaching degrees as they ruin their personal styles and their inner wisdom remains hidden.

When you are like others, then the rules of the masses apply to you. Then you get into the competition and end up chasing clients rather than let the clients chase you. When you let your core shine through, you become a leader and you start attracting massive followings.

So never forget: eagles don’t flock. Craft your own unique style and see what it will do to your life.

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